- Official Post
I presume we've all seen the LoZ cartoon series at this point. "ExcuUuUuUuse me princess" and whatnot. Chip cheerio. Thirteen episodes of pure fuckin' awful. Even as a die hard fan of both LoZ, and '80s cartoons, it's hard to find anything redeemable in that show. There's a fucking water park episode for crissakes.
Anyway, yesterday I was bored, and I decided to write an ad hoc sort of pitch / story bible / whatever for the way I would write the Legend of Zelda show. I set two limitations. First, the show has to have a status quo to return to at the end of each episode. This isn't progressive storytelling, this is children's TV in the 80. Second, the show can only be based on Zelda 1 and 2. No Link to the Past, or anything following it. Just the first two games.
I skipped over a lot of details that weren't immediately necessary for creating the structure of the show. Like Gannon's "colorful lieutenants." But I'm curious to know what folks think.
Protagonists:
Link. A 12 year old boy who fends for himself in the lost woods. Lackadaisical, but brave (to the point of brashness), and loyal to a fault.
Zelda: A 14 year old princess of Hyrule. Smart, well read, and clever. She's serious minded, and often has a biting quip on the tip of her tongue. She is deeply compassionate, but doesn't show it very well because she has a hard time telling the difference between fixing a problem, and showing that you care.
Impa: A hunched, elderly woman who serves as Zelda's tutor and guardian. She is wise, and surprisingly spry for an older gal. Spry enough to accompany Zelda and Link on their adventures, though she usualy has to leave fighting or other strenuous activity to the youngsters.
"The Old Man." A 90+ y/o Knight of Hyrule who long ago retired. He lives in a cave deep in the lost woods. He is wise, and skilled. His home serves as the protagnoist's "base of operations," and the Old Man himself serves as Link's teacher. He's extremely skilled, but too frail to accompany the other three on adventures.
The Queen of Hyrule. A temperate ruler. She has the same cleverness that Zelda does, but it is tempered by age and experience. She's in her mid-40s now, but she's still capable with a sword and shield, knows some magic, and is an excellent ruler. Will spend most of the series chained to a wall.
The Antagonists:
Gannon: Full on pig-monster Gannon. However, he rarely serves as the main antagonist of an episode. He's got sort of a Dr. Claw thing going on, where we rarely see him. We see his chair from behind, or we see his silhouette in shadows. Occasionally we might see a closeup of his eyes or something. But only rarely will he really come out in full. Gannon is too ruthless and evil for a kids show. So the less we see him, and the less he says, the more can be left to the imagination.
The Lieutenants: Gannon will have between 4 and 6 lieutenants. These will be colorful characters, analogous to the bosses of a dungeon. Each episode will have one of these characters serving as the primary antagonist. They present a plan to Gannon, and Gannon says "go do your thing," and then the episode is about how that antagonist attempts to carry out Gannon's will. Each lieutenant will have their own visual and tactical style. In a way, these lieutenants will represent different kinds of episodes the show can have. For example, one might be a wizard. If the wizard is the bad guy in this episode, then the episode will be about magic. That sort of thing.
This setup allows Gannon to remain intimidating. If he's the main antagonist in each episode, then by necessity he fails in each episode. If he fails in each episode, then he's not a scary bad guy. He's a bumbler. Using a rotating roster of antagonists allows each of them to remain a little more intimidating as well. None of them are getting beaten EVERY week. Just one in every 4-6 weeks.
It also gives you a good amount of variety to work with in the show. Enough that things aren't predicatble, but not so much that you're just doing monster-of-the-week stuff.
The Status Quo:
Gannon has taken over Hyrule Castle, is holding the Queen hostage, and is in the process of subjugating all of the lands of Hyrule around him. Zelda, Impa, and Link are hiding out with The Old Man, and attempting to thwart Gannon's evil plans, free the Queen, and restore her to the throne.
Recurring Setpieces:
"The Villain meeting:" Will often happen early in an episode, and perhaps again at the end. In Gannon's dark throne room is a table where all the lieutenants sit. One of them stands and tells Gannon part of their plan. Gannon gives them permission to go forward. This is a good place to develop the lietenants' personalities as they banter in a room together. The queen is also chained up here, so she can shout things like "You'll never get away with this!"
"Study" Both Link and Zelda are very young, and study under their two elders. The Old Man teaches both of them how to fight, and Impa teaches both of them how to be wise and use magic.
Rule:
No character may be captured (even briefly) more than one time per season. Characters who are kidnapped should work to rescue themselves. At the very least, they should meet their rescuers halfway. For example, if Zelda is captured, perhaps she has to find a way to light a signal fire to let Link know where she is being held. She doesn't simply sit still and wait for Link to come get her.
Rule:
While the show will always return to its status quo, each episode should see some small growth or plot advancement. Characters should NOT learn the same lessons over and over again. When they learn a lesson, future episodes should reflect that. There should also be small plot advancements from time to time.
Season 1 Episode Ideas:
Ep1: Setup episode. The long seige of Hyrule Castle ends as the Queen surrenders so that her people within the walls will not go hungry. Zelda and Impa slip out the back way, and flee into the lost woods. They are pursued and ambushed. Link, scavenging nearby, hears the commotion and comes to help them. Impa leads them to the Old Man (whom she remembers from when he used to be a Knight). The Old Man takes them in, and is impressed with Link's bravery. Gives him a sword, and offers to teach him to use it.
Ep2: As an immediate reaction to the first episode, the villains send their best tracker to find the escaped princess. In the end, they manage to stay hidden, but Impa almost botches the whole thing by being too overprotective of Zelda. She learns that she has to allow Zelda to face danger, or they'll never be able to get anything done.
Ep3. After only a few weeks of training, Link has gotten cocky about his fighting abilities. He does something brash, and gets himself captured. He feels deeply ashamed and hopeless. Has a brief meeting with the queen, as they are both prisoners. She gives him some sage advice, and he manages to escape. Tries to help the queen out as well, but can't. Promises to come back for her. Zelda and Impa sneak into the castle using some secret passages, and help link find the way out. There should be some payoff where link succeeds by understanding his own limits.
Ep ~7: One of the antagonists poisons a river. The poison turns anyone who drinks from it into sludge monsters with the mission of finding Zelda. Wording is specifically "Until Zelda is in Gannon's dungeon, or until she is no more!" or something like that. Zelda struggles with what it means to be a ruler. She solves this problem by drinking from the river and becoming a Sludgebeast. Since she is "no more," the spell is broken, and she and all the peasants revert to normal.
Ep23 and 24: Season finale 2 parter. The Queen escapes from Gannon's clutches. The protagonists are hopeful that they can really drive Gannon from the land soon. Good times! Woo! But, tired of his underling's failures, Gannon decides to address the problem of these meddlesome protagonists for the first time. Episode 23 ends with Zelda being captured by Gannon. The bulk of episode 24 is a failed attempt to rescue Zelda. The episode ends with the Queen offering herself as a prisoner exchange. Gannon accepts, because it's obviously the better option for him, and he thinks the Queen is doing it out of pure sentimentality for her daughter. The Queen has a brief moment with Zelda, and tells her that she's actually doing it because she believes in Zelda's ability to overthrow Ganon. After all, Zelda has been leading the resistance to Gannon for months now. The queen believes that it's better for Zelda to be in charge than it is to change leaders in the middle of a war. Zelda manages to slip the queen of MacGuffin which allows Zelda & the Queen to magically communicate sometimes, which will change the status quo slightly for season 2.
