• Mkay, so as of late, some of you may know, I have developed a relationship with a gril. We're both 15, Catholic, and serious about our faith and have very different parents and upbringing, (me being towards poverty and my parents divorced when I was young so I virtually don't know my father and have 3 younger siblings and my mother recently remarried. She grew up with friends all over the place has both parents and her father has a very bountiful carrier job.) For about a year now we've known each other, and we have been privately interested in each other with each other's knowing for about 9 months. In otherwords she's "not" my girlfriend technically, but she is. I have had very few friends growing up, and most of them were total assholes (most of and only being 2 of them).

    As of the other night I invited said friends and grilfriend over for a movie as an excuse for her to be able to come over and hang out. Long story short friendno.2 starts beating the shit out of me, I act like it's nothing and just get on with it, next thing i know friendno.1 starts doing the same and starts to then threaten the girl. I get pissed naturally and tell him not to do f-cking s-it, he not long after goes and throws a whole cup of ice water on her after she did nothing to him other tell him to stop beating the s-it out of me. I spray him with the hose trying to not loose it and keep him away from her. He then chokes me and beats me sensless and I am like I don't give a f-k as long as he is away from her. He then proceeds to throw me into a freshly trimmed bush which is not pleasurable FYI after I tried to get away from him. She gets herself involved (being the older sister of one sibling who has minor mental disabilities she is very protective) I make sure she doesn't get hurt but before anything else friendno.1 raises his fists to her and I get near and he throws a punch that I willingly and purposefully caught(in the stomach).

    I tell her to not get involved again she gets an understanding and walks out he then proceeds to beat the shit out of me some more alongside friendno.2 until they left. Before they left though I told friendno.1 that this is not ok and so on there was plenty of profamity and essentially "if I ever see you near her again" kind of thing. Next day later he is at church and so am I and so is she, I pull him to the side and tell him that this isn't happening again and that he is a dick, also that my stepfather is extremely pissed, (which he was when he caught wind of the situation and told me to tell him that (step-dad is in cali atm)).

    The thing is that friendsno.1+2 have serious issues and will beat the shit out of me for literally no reason, just walk in the room then I'm in a headlock being kicked in the groin and punched in the nose. Nearly a decade of my life has been spent with these guys and I know their family and parents and their parents don't give them any consequences to their actions and so they continue with this BS without fear of punishment. *(protip: friendno.1 is 6ft 3in + and 17yo friendno.2 is 6ft 2in + and 15 years old, both work out and my gril is 14yo and 5f 9in)

    So what do ya'll think of this, cause this is just about my life story right here

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  • Hola crap, that sure is messed up.

    You cannot control the environment outside your home, like church going but make sure to have them banned from your house. Don't open the door to them. No matter how many years you have been together if they are frigging beating for nothing they are definitely not being your friends.

    I suppose other people didn't jump in because it is a thorny issue, we don't know all the details and misguided advice by a bad assumption could get you in a even worse situation. it is good your uncle knows of this, even though he's not near you at this time.

    The only idea I have is, how about you and your girlfriend change churches? Would that put you guys in a worse risk?
    I am sorry you are going through all this crap.

  • Well I am a Catholic and in the church there is an enormous schism that is going on making everything very difficult so the only alternative church is about two hours away from home. Thiss was really just a thing I wrote up in the middle of the night I'm working it all out and it's really complicated. So I've pretty much done all I can including most of the things you mentioned. I just wrote this cause at the time and to this day other than her there's not really anyone I can talk to about it and since you guys have no connection with my family/life physically and I feel you guys are cool enough to take it seriously enough and not just write it off as drama, I feel like that any way. If anyone wants to comment please do I'm all cooled down now and it's over with, so have at it I don't mind. And no offense but I'm not exactly going to take advice to the max after reading it I like to contemplate things very thoroughly before taking action so I am going to be all good don't worry about bad advice or if it wouldn't/couldn't apply to me I'll figure it out on my own no problem.

    Thanks for that Kaynil and that's probably the just about best thing I could do but things are really really complicated, and it's mostly because of the Catholic church right now, if you want to discus that we can use this thread cause Idon't think there's much more to say or we could make another and I could explain the whole situation or elaborate the related parts to this incident.

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  • The situation you describe, is three things - shit_y, difficult, and simple. These people are not friends. I think it's important you don't shrug that fact off as 'oh I know that', because you clearly seem to regard them as your asshole friends, when really you need to regard them as dangerous. You need to break contact, estrange yourself, block their numbers. The logical thing would be to regard them as dangerous criminals, not as mates who happen to be dick_. Violence is never casual, and you should not treat it as such. If violence happens in future, hope that it's in a public place or a place with cameras and file a police report (it's illegal, FYI). Do not pass it off as normal, unless you want your life and attitude towards it to be messed forevermore. You need to make a decision to lead a normal life, and not be flexible about it.

  • The situation you describe, is three things - shit_y, difficult, and simple. These people are not friends. I think it's important you don't shrug that fact off as 'oh I know that', because you clearly seem to regard them as your asshole friends, when really you need to regard them as dangerous. You need to break contact, estrange yourself, block their numbers. The logical thing would be to regard them as dangerous criminals, not as mates who happen to be dick_. Violence is never casual, and you should not treat it as such. If violence happens in future, hope that it's in a public place or a place with cameras and file a police report (it's illegal, FYI). Do not pass it off as normal, unless you want your life and attitude towards it to be messed forevermore. You need to make a decision to lead a normal life, and not be flexible about it.


    I really like how you mentioned this as a both complicated and simple scenario. That's rather prudent analogy. The whole making myself estrange has already been in effect a good while, and the considering them just to be the "dick friends" is far behind. Hopefully I can get away with it being in public next time near some concrete evidence but they tend to be a little bit better than that unfortunately. Really appreciate your insight on it though.

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