The Legend of Zelda: the Wind Waker Parody

Chapter 11: Kalle Demos

Link:*Fly over to the Forbidden Woods* This place is freaky. I mean, really! Look at all this crappy sh/t.

Pile of sh/t: You just hate me because I?m brown.

Link: ?Where?d you come from?

Pile of sh/t: Duh. An ass.

Link: o.o *walks away*

Pile of sh/t: Don?t run away from your feelings!

Link: Hmm?Where do I go? Hey writer! Take we where I need to go!

Me: Okay! *Opens up a portal to hell*

Link: Gah! Not there! *Walks around for hours* *Finds the boss door*

Door: Halt!

Link: Oh no! I don?t have the key!

Door:
You do not need a key
You do not need to cry,
All you must do, is give my riddle try!

Link: Oh yeah? Lay it on me.

Door:
A man is running in the ran you see
But his hair does not wet at all
The ran runs down his face,
But his hair stays dry. Why?

Link: He?s bald.

Door: Correct. *Opens*

Link: Sweet!

Maker: H-help me! P-P-Please!

Link: Aww! So cute!

Maker: P-P-Please!

Kalle Demos: *Eats Maker* Tastes like a damn pencil.

Link: Hey! Wait a minute!

Kalle Demos: Damn it, what?

Link: The boomerang! I don?t have it!

Kalle Demos: So?

Link: I can?t fight you without it!

Steelia: *Throws boomerang* Hurry! Restrain Midna!

Midna: Let me go! I?ll sho him what he forgot! He got forgot vitamin dose of M!

Dark Link: M?

Midna: ME! Let me go!

Shrukan: *Helps drag me away* *Comes back* DL, come on.

DL: Why? I wanna see the fight!

Shrukan: *Grabs his ear and walks away*

Link: *Cuts vines* Give him back!

Kalle Demos: Never damn it!

{The battle takes place for hours, finally Link kills Kalle Demos}

Kalle Demos: Damn it! Lights fading, limbs growing cold. Head?falling off?.*dies*

Maker: Y-Y-You s-s-s-saved me! T-Thank you elf!

Link: What?

Maker: T-T-Thank you. A-Are you h-here t-to save m-me?

Link:: Uh huh.

Maker: T-Thank y-you.
_________________________________________
GDT: Maker! Your alive!

Maker: C-Can I-I play my s-song?

GDT: Suuuuuuuuuuure!

Maker: *Plays*

Link: Heey! That?s pretty catchy!

{To be continued on the next chapter. *Evil smile*}

You guys are lucky I'm done with this chapter. Bed time for me!

Chapter 12: The Bomb Bag

Link: Thanks for Farore?s Pearl Great Deku Tree.

GDT: Noooooooooo problem!

Link: *runs off* Hey King! Look! I got the second one!

KORL: Whoa, now you?ve got ****ing 4 balls!

Link: What? I?ve only got 2 pearls and what are- Oh your disgusting!

KORL: ****ing moron. Are you gonna stand there like a moron or are we gonna go to get the next ****ing pearl?

Link: Yes!

KORL: You better ****ing sail this time moron.

Link: I enjoy your company.

KORL: Off we go.
__________________________

KORL: Why are we ****ing here at Windfall?

Link: I saw Tetra?s ship. I think she?s here!

KORL: Ugh.

Link: Be right back! *runs off*

KORL: *Notices the ship* Why hello there. How long have you been here?
__________________________________

Link: Hello? Is anyone in there? ?In the bomb shop?

Voice: NO!

Link: *Walks to over side and climbs in through hole* The pirates!

Smarty: Yo Gonzo, you know how Tetra is all pretty and all that?

Gonzo: Yeah. Sure. Whatever.

Smarty: Well, if you and Tetra got married, you guys would have a very smart kid!

Link: Eww.

Gonzo: Yeah. Sure. Whatever.

Tetra: Like, that is like so totally gross. I?m 12 and he?s like, what? 32?

Link: Heh.

Tetra: See you guys at the bar. *Hears link giggle* *looks up*

Link: sh/t!

Tetra: *winks*
_________________________________

Link: I got in the ship! Yes! Now where?s Nikko?

Nikko: LOL! Newbie is back!

Link: -_-

Nikko: Wazz up newbie? Since the mods and admin is away, have you come to play? LOL!

Link: No. I?ve come for something else. Like a bomb bag.

Nikko: LOL! I shoulda guessed. WTF man. *gives*

Link: DA-DA-DAAAAAAAA! YOU STOLE SOMETHING FROM THE PIRATES! THEIR NOT SO HOT NO MORE!

Nikko: ROFLMAO

Link: Huh?! The stone! *answers* Gah! Tetra!

Tetra: Your so totally a rat. Are like, stealing from me? Whatever. You won?t win. You won?t.

It's finally up everyone!

Chapter 13: Nayru?s Pearl

Link: King! Tetra said we have until morning to get to Outset! We?ve only got- What are you doing?

King: Making out with this hot babe.

Link: ?It?s a ship?.

King: And I?m a boat.

Link: Are you ready?

King: I guess.

Link: Off we go to Outset!

King: Way to go captain obvious. We have to go to-

Shrukan, Dark Link, Steelia: Noooooo! Shut up before Midna gets here! Sail to Outset! Hurry!

Link: o.o;
_____________________

Link: What do we do? Can I go visit Grandma?

King: I don?t care.

Link: Granny! I?m coming!!!

King: o.o

Link: *walks in* Grandma? Are you in here? Gran- What the hell!

Grandma: *knocked out on the floor* Beer?so?.much?.beer?

Link: ?I say! *Walks back to King* Are you ready?

King: ****ing moron. What the f*** do you think?

Link: Yes. We got to back of Island? I saw a whirlpool there.

King: o.o

Link: King?

King: o.o

Link: Hello?

King: ****ing moron! I?m a boat!

Link: Your point?

King: Ugh!

*A few moments later*

Link: Whoa! What the hell is that?!

King: It?s Jabun you ****ing moron.

Jabun: /./<><:::??()(_)_%^&*&$%$

Link: ?What did he say?

Jabun: .<>:{}{?;/;/;/;\\|(!@#$$%%^%

Link: HELLO! King, what did he say?

King: He said have the pearl.

Link: Sweet.

Jabun: /\/\0|_H$^&^%^

King: He said Mother ****er. ****ing moron.

Link: -_-

Chapter 14: The Tower of Gods

Link: Yes! Finally! I?ve got them! YES! PARTAY!

King: No. We must put the pearls where the belong you ****ing moron.

Link: You?ve been calling me a ****ing moron ever since we met! Don?t you got a new nickname for me?

King: Blondie.

Link: No! I like ****ing moron better!

King: Eh. I like Blondie better.

Link: NO!!!

King: Goodbye ****ing moron and hello Blondie!

Link: Ugh! Me and my big mouth! We might as well put these where they belong.

*A few days later*

Link: KING! There?s a huge octorock in the way! MOVE!

Octorock: I?ll make you fancy, I?ll make you great! The kind of gal the prince would date!

Link: ?.

Octorock: Rawr!

Link: ?Can I help you?

Octorock: I?ll take a cheeseburger happy meal with coke.

Link: ?

Octorock: With fries!

Link: this isn?t Mickey D?s moron!

Octorock: No? Okayz. Bye.

Link: The final pearl! *Puts pearl on statue*

Statue: S-steroids? Pearl! Your back! *explodes*

Link: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

*Smacks into the Tower of Gods*

Shrukan: Daaaaaaaaaaamn. That?s gotta hurt!

Dark Link: HAHAHA! HE GOT PWNED!

Prince_Zora: Lol.

Muigi: Sweet.

god or zelda: hahaha!

Steelia: Hey wait a minute, where?is?

Me: Moo ha! Die Hero of wi-

Everyone: *slaps me*

Me: What the hell!

Everyone: Don?t tell him who he is!

Me: FINE!

Link: ?*falls into water*

Everyone: Frostbite! ?wait?what?!

While you guys are waiting for the next chapter, I've decided to start Mini Parodys! They entrtain you while I'm working on a chapter! How about it?

Chapter 15: Hyrule

Link: This…is the tower of the gods?

King: Hell yeah Blondie.

Link: Ugh!

King: Ha ha ha.

Link: Sooooooooooo, we go in?

King: Yep. *goes in*

Link: Agh!

King: What the hell is your problem Blondie?

Link: Stop calling me that! There’s a ninja up-head!

Naruto: …How’d you know what I was?

Link: Midna’s avvy!

Me: Hey!

Prince_Zora: Lol, he’s right Midna.

Shrukan:

Dark Link: Are you gonna continue on? I mean really, you gotta battle the gods, then me!

Me: Your thinking of OoT.

Dark Link: Oh yeah.

Steelia: XD

Link: Shut up! Will you move please? I wanna battle the gods.

Naruto: What the heck man! You don’t even have the key!

Link: I just remembered something.

King & Naruto: What?

Link: Why are YOU here anyway?

Me: I put him there so whenever you go to a new place, you gotta battle him to go on.

Link & Naruto: SAY WHAT?!

King: Enough of this shit. Blondie! Get back in here. We’ll find the key okay Kitty?

Naruto: Ugh!

Link: That’s mean.

King: I don’t care!
_________________________

Link: This is crap! I found the key, I’m in front of the door, and I can’t reach the damn lock?! Uh!

King: It feels good to be far from Blondie.

Link: Open! Open, open, open, open, open, open, OPEN!

Door:
There’s no need to fear!
Bid ol’ door is here!

Link: …

Door:
I will sing a song you see
Then you must guess who I sung.
Does this confuse thee?

Link: No.

Door:
“Nobody’s Perfect! I gotta work it!”

Link: What the! How should I know?!

Door:
Thou shall not pass
Till thee guesses.

Link: Um….Avril Lagvine?

Door:
No.

Link: Bruce Springsteen?

Door:
No again.

Link: Hannah Montana?

Door:
Yes! *opens*

Link: Sweet!

Gohdan: Oh shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.

Link: o.o;

Gohdan: Have you come to battle me oh great hero of time?

Hands: Head, it’s Hero of Winds.

Gohdan: Ohhhhhhhhhh shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.

Link: I’m a hero?

Gohdan: Nooooo shit doofus.

Link: Grr…

{Link fights gohdan, shooting his eyes out and then getting bombs out and blows his head off.}

Link: King! I did it! I did it! I beat- oh my gosh we’re sinking!

King: Yay.

Link: *Can’t…breath* Hey! I can breath!

King: Well no shit dumbass.

Link: ;_;